Roots

With only five days until I leave for Panama, the gravity of the situation has begun to hit me.  Leaving Asheville and having to say goodbye to some of the people that I have loved the most is the hardest thing I've ever done.  Everything feels so final even though I know it's not.  A friend of mine, who I don't see very often but love just the same sent me some encouraging words that I wanted to share.

Just wanted to let you know.

I don't know what it's like to move out of the country.
BUT, I do know what it's like to get comfortable, be happy & love where you are only to move on to the next step.

I think we are alike in that way - always wanting to do more, but finding we create new roots wherever we go. Roots are hard to pull up, no matter how shallow or deep. 

All my best & love & happy thoughts - I'm proud of you.

I've been needing to hear that.   So guys, sorry to say, you are my roots and you won't be coming up anytime soon.  Get used to it.

Changes

I am struggling with leaving. I have come to a point with myself where I love my life. I have fantastic friends and I have fun and I love and I live; so why did I decide to move thousands of miles away? I know it is something I must do or I will regret it. I know that it will be one of the greatest adventures I can take. I know it will enrich my life and make me better. I am just afraid of losing the people I love. Things will never be as they are again; it's a hard reality to accept. My group of friends will change, most of them will not be in Asheville when I return, I will not have a job to come back to, the person I have loved will move on and away from me, I may fail, I may succeed, I may lose myself, I may never find someone to love again, I will change. Things will change. Everyone will change.

I am scared.

Leaving on a jet plane....

I finally have my ticket to Panama. They emailed details to me a week ago. I fly out of Greensboro on July 27th. SO.... less than a month. It's getting stressful dealing with all of the issues. Mainly, getting my visa. Oh, and the whole packing up my life thing and saying goodbye. That's pretty hard too.